The Last Emperor’s Music and the Weight of Time


Day 449 of German

Sakamoto Ryuichi passed away in March 2023. A new documentary detailing the last three years of his life, post-cancer diagnosis, is set for release in late November, featuring excerpts from his personal diary. I can’t wait to see it.

My relationship with his music spans decades. As a child, I saw Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence without my parents knowing; I was too young for the film, but I loved the music and the performances. Later, I heard his score in The Last Emperor—the film bored me as a pre-teen, but the music was mesmerizing.

I remember watching his television interviews while living in Japan in my early twenties during the early 2000s. He was a handsome, middle-aged man who emanated an undeniable confidence in the press and on television.

Now, watching the preview of his last years, I see Sakamoto continued to create music even after his cancer diagnosis. Knowing this musician since my childhood, only to be reminded of his death now that I am middle-aged, is a stark reminder of the passing of time and the finitude of life.

I wish I had perceived this finitude more clearly when I was in my twenties in Japan; I feel I truly wasted my time there. Yet, as Sakamoto’s diary states: 「過去を後悔しても何も変わらない」 (Regretting the past changes nothing).

All I can do now is treasure my remaining time, improve the languages I love, and use them to experience the world.

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